eating

If I Eat This Scone

Why oh why did I buy this scone while sitting here at Proof Bakery in Atwater Village where the pastries are tempting and the cakes are alluring and I came for a sandwich but now I want coffee and while ordering coffee I heard my mouth say, “I’ll have a scone too” and the woman said, “It’s cherry” and I said, “Ooooh” and she said, “I’ll give you an extra big one” and I was like, in my head, “Nooo, don’t, because I’m supposed to go to the gym later!” and I know if I eat this scone I probably won’t go to the gym later which is faulty logic seeing as eating the scone should make me want to go to the gym more because there’s more to burn but, in fact, it makes me want to go to the gym less because I’ve already blown it, health-wise, so what’s the point as I stare at this scone in front of me and question whether I should eat it at all or just take it home to reward myself with later.

Frank Bruni’s “Born Round”

Iconic male food writers like A.J. Liebling and R.W. Apple were large men; they flaunted their girth in ways that their female counterparts (M.F.K. Fisher, Elizabeth David, Ruth Reichl) did not. Their weight helped them cultivate an aura of power and authority; it’s easy to imagine them sitting in a brown leather chair, patting their tummies after a large meal, smoking a very expensive cigar and sipping a very fine Brandy. But to quote the Monkees: that was then and this is now.

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