It’s not every day that you have your worst restaurant experience ever. Mine happened a few weeks ago, upon my return from Seattle and Cape Cod. Literally: it was my first meal back and the food gods rightly punished me for making a waste of it.
Park Slope has two sushi joints I frequent: one is Taro which, as I’ve said in the past, serves the best sushi in town. The other, ____, is far inferior; the salad a soupy mess, the sushi poorly executed and rarely ever fresh. Why, on my first day back, did I go to ____ over Taro for lunch? Because, I am embarrassed to admit, I was lazy. I was nearer to ____ at lunchtime than I was to Taro; so I went to _____. And, rightly, I was punished: but did the punishment fit the crime?
The picture might give it away, but let me set the scene.
I didn’t have a magazine, so I was reading an Us Weekly they had in a stack at the front. (Was I punished for that too?)
I had the soupy salad which I grudgingly slurped down, splashing a little on to Hanna Montana’s face. Or was that Miley Cyrus’s face? Wait, is that the same person?
And then the bento box arrived: comfortingly compartmentalized, there was the edamame, the fried ball thingies (what are those thingies?), the three pieces of sushi with the cuts of fish resting on top of the rice, and then a California roll.
I started with the edamame, biting into the skin and dragging my teeth down to shoot the salty green beans into my mouth. I moved over to one of the fried ball thingies and ate one, two, three right up so I could get them over and done with.
Now it was time to try the California roll. I lifted the first piece, dunked it into a mixture of wasabi and soy sauce, and shoved it into my mouth. I did the same with the second piece.
Then I moved to the three pieces of sushi with the fish on top of the rice (is there a name for that? When it’s not a roll?) I ate the white one–the one that wasn’t salmon or tuna–because that’s my least favorite and I wanted to save my favorites for last.
I ate another piece of edamame. And then another.
And then it happened.
I went for another piece of Califorania roll. My chopsticks descended, they clasped onto a piece, and lifted.
Squiggling there, wedged between that piece and another, was the grossest vision I’ve ever seen on a plate in a restaurant or, for that matter, anywhere else.
It was a roach. A black, slimy roach.
I yelped.
Literally: I made an embarrassing noise. I shot out of my seat and made the noise; there was a physical leap out of my booth and then a yelp and heads turned.
Of course, no one working there noticed. I stared down and the roach was still squiggling. I wanted to barf.
Finally, I got a waitress’s attention. She came to me and I pointed to the bug on the plate and said “bug”: she looked and, startled, she lifted the plate up and carried it to the kitchen.
I took a deep breath and stared deeply into Hannah Montana’s eyes. I wanted nothing more than to get up and leave that restaurant, to never return, ever ever ever again.
So I stood up and walked to the kitchen, where the waitress was showing the plate to the men working there.
“Excuse me,” I said. “No more food.”
(The waitress didn’t speak good English.)
“No more?” she asked, a bit confused.
“Just a check, please,” I said, stupidly, since the roach in the sushi should’ve given me a free pass to go. “I’ll pay for the salad and leave.”
She went to the printer, printed out the bill for the salad ($3), I laid $4 down–she still deserved some kind of tip, right?–and I rushed out into the street.
I walked briskly, I didn’t look back. And I vowed never, ever, ever to return to ___ again. Ever.
As for eating sushi again, it took a few days but then, a week later (I think–or less?), I returned to the loving arms of my preferred Park Slope sushi joint, Taro. Oh Taro, why did I ever shirk your love? You’d never traumatize me with squirming roaches on the plate, you’re so much better than that!
Thus concludes my worst restaurant experience ever. You may have noticed that I removed the name of the restaurant from the post; I thought it over, and as much as I’d like to punish the place for serving me a roach, I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt this time around and not make it so when people Google the restaurant, this story comes up. Those who are savvy and who’ve been reading my blog for a long time will figure it out.
In the meantime, what’s your worst restaurant experience ever?
the rice with a slice of fish is nigiri. The rolls are maki.
What a horrible experience. I would not be as nice as you are. I would post a yelp review or blog about them by name.
I was at a Chili’s and ordered something on a bun. I don’t know what possessed me to pick up the sandwich and look under it, but I’m really glad I did. The bottom bun was covered in green mold.
I also had a nice fly in my salad (but not in my soup) at an Outback Steakhouse. I didn’t even get anything free out of that one. Sheesh!
Honestly, Adam, I wish you would identify the awful place. I’ve been reading your blog for a long time but I don’t live in Brooklyn so I really don’t know where you mean. Alas, I will just have to make it a rule never to eat sushi in Park Slope anywhere except Taro.
I was eating at the end of the bar at an iizakaya on St. Marks when I observe a family of cockroaches crawling up the wall right next to me. In shock, I look up towards the chef behind the bar. He looks back at me, nods his head, and tells me he’ll take 15% off if I keep quiet. I kept quiet, but it seemed to me like he had seen that kind of thing all the time. Yech!
Kiku?
horrible horrible, i hate roaches!!! they fly!!!
Rats!A friend of mine and I were eating at a place in our town here in China. Well the rat scurried under our feet around the room and up on the bar and into the kitchen. We finished our meal, the new expat in town was really freaked out,we tried to calm her down and told her she would get used to it after a year. The locals in the place did not even bat an eye. I guess living in Southern China 10 plus years we get used to things like that as the standards here are a bit shall we say different. The rats always know the best places to eat I guess.
Roaches I spent the first 6 months in our current house trying to get the upper hand on those pesky things. Thank goodness I have not seen many of those lately and only outside, they do love the heat and humidity here. I broke a wooden spoon stabbing one to death our first year in China 1996 that amused my then 7 1/2 year old (now 20yr old daughter).
The other day when I was fixing dinner, I had a bad moment with weevils in the rice. I had to toss it out and realized we had rice for lunch. My Chinese helper fixed lunch and either did not notice or figured it was ok to eat. That is probably my most recent bad food experience. Extra protein anyone. ;)
Eww……
fried ball things: maybe octopus balls? batter + pieces of octopus = takoyaki.
You’re right not to give the name. Two reasons. First, they deserve the benefit of the doubt. Disasters can happen. Maybe it was just bad luck. Second many bloggers – and you are not among them… that’s your charm – believe that any outlet to vent gives them the right to do so. I’ve seen bad situations on Yelp and Chow where people imagine themselves to have authority and boy do they love wielding it. But you’re much too nice for that — and that’s great. A related point — as you know the City of NY posts inspection reports, so you could go online to find out whether this seems to be a pattern with this restaurant.
http://www.nyc.gov/html/doh/html/rii/index.shtml
Cheers, BB
Being sold a 25$ glass of wine by the glass, from a bottle that must have been sitting out, opened for days (this was a first seating lunch) at David Drakes in Rahway, NJ…….that had about 2 dozen fruit flies in it. This was a suggested pairing when I asked (the wine not the flies).
to top it off, when I called the waiter over, I did not get even a sorry, and they did not even offer to comp me a glass. 140$+ tip lunch. It’s sad that this was my first experience at what others say is one of NJ’s best, as I’m very reluctant to go back.
Same thing; Thai restaurant in Tallahassee FL (of the two, it was NOT the one you’d expect – it was the clean-looking one).
But instead of pointing it out (as it leapt from the rice bowl), some super-gentlemanly part of my lizard brain decided to SWOOP and grab it, crush and flick it on floor. Why? I was on a date.
She missed seeing my darting hand; I stiffly excused myself to wash my hands. We’d nearly finished our meal so I avoided any awkward “so, let’s stop eating now!” banter.
I didn’t know how to get my meal comped without letting my date in on the problem, so when the gal came around again I asked for the check and suggested dessert elsewhere. What else to do? Stoic in the face of adversity, that’s me.
Ack! Some of us live in Park Slope, and are deathly afraid of roaches. I appreciate the tact involved in not saying the name, but any sort of clue you can give us Park Slopians, so we can never, ever go there?
It didn’t happen to me, but my friend found a used bandaid in her enchiladas. She had already eaten half of them. The waiter just picked it out and said “that happens sometimes.”
She stopped eating but still had to pay!
Oh my god, that is so horrifying. I would never be able to eat again (ok, that’s an exaggeration – but I’m so grossed out now).
I’d love to know the name of this place, and it’s not wrong to publicize it when a disaster of this caliber takes place there- must warn the others! I live in Park Slope and out of fear I will never get sushi at anywhere other than Taro now.
I’d love to know the name of this place, and it’s not wrong to publicize it when a disaster of this caliber takes place there- must warn the others! I live in Park Slope and out of fear I will never get sushi at anywhere other than Taro now.
I think you should post the name. Part of the beauty of the blog is that you can tell people “This happened to me, and this is where it happened.” Dude. The roach was IN YOUR FOOD. Sorry to remind you of that, but it wasn’t just on the floor, on the wall, even on the table, it was in your f*cking food. That is beyond disgusting and I think that should be an automatic closure. HOW DO YOU MAKE A ROLL AND NOT NOTICE THIS? Sorry but also, you know in your description, it was STUCK between the two pieces, so it’s like the sushi chef cut it, then split it so they’d sit next to each other… and didn’t notice a roach running around? Those suckers are fast and usually try to avoid being squished. How dirty or dark is the sushi area that he didn’t see this thing trying to get away? F*cking. NASTY.
PS I’ve “only” had roach incidents at restaurants three times now. The third being on Sunday, which I WILL be posting about WITH the restaurant identified. The first time was at a restaurant that has since closed, because no one ever went there (even before I went and wrote about it), and the roaches are probably why. The second time was at Da Silvano, yes that one, the place all the celebrities go to, I don’t understand why or how when the food sucks and a roach ran onto the table, onto my friend’s napkin. And each and every time something like this happens (hopefully never again), I will write about it with honesty. I never say “This WILL happen to YOU if you go here as well” I am simply saying “THIS happened to ME when I went there”.
Also, I grew up eating in Chinatown, Flushing, some of the dirtiest (looking) places you’ll ever see, but only in these 3 restaurants I just named have I ever EVER had a roach run onto the table.
Oh ugh that is awful. I started reading the story before the picture loaded so I had NO idea what was coming. In high school, we all went to this chinese place or a gyro place down the street that we saw roches at a few of times but still ate their regularly. The convenience of how close it was plus cheap and tasty kind of balanced out the roaches we saw on the floor near the door. NEVER saw roches in our food.
I would totally call this place out, too. Roaches are damn near impossible to eliminate in densley populated areas, but in your food is totally totally unacceptable, and I have a hard time believing it was a one time thing. Just thinking about the roaches running around the prep areas unnoticed… yecch.
I had a similar experience with takeout Chinese food.
I was working my way through my shrimp with eggplant in spicy garlic sauce. Took a clump of brown rice into my chopsticks, and was startled to see half of a cooked roach mixed in with the rice.
I don’t think that I ate the other half, but still.
I had a similar experience with takeout Chinese food.
I was working my way through my shrimp with eggplant in spicy garlic sauce. Took a clump of brown rice into my chopsticks, and was startled to see half of a cooked roach mixed in with the rice.
I don’t think that I ate the other half, but still.
Oh god. That is horrifyingly disgusting. You should have just walked out, Adam. Did you have the heebie-jeebies for the rest of the day? Because I might, and it’s not even my story!
Yeah, there are so many different kinds of “fried ball things” available in Japanese food, it’s hard to come up with something that may be correct. My first thought was Inari, but octopus balls sounds like it may be more correct.
I’ve got to say, I’m a little bit disappointed in your lack of sushi lingo knowledge.
Check this out:
http://www.eugeneciurana.com/musings/sushi-eating-HOWTO.html
Especially look at his gallery:
http://eugeneciurana.com/galereya/view_photo.php?set_albumName=sushi-HOWTO-companion&id=IMG_0407
It makes me hungry every time I surf over there in need of a sushi fix without actually going out and spending the money. :o)
As a fellow Park Sloper and Taro devotee, I’d be interested to know the name of the roachy restaurant.
Ew! Unfortunately, this kind of thing happens a lot more than it should. I’ve been the victim of the roach in food scenario a few times myself. Once, the varmint was discovered in a plate of pasta fra diavolo that I had already eaten half of. I’m sick just thinking about it!
Recently, my husband and I took his parents out to a “nice” restaurant for their 50th. When my order arrived, it had a baked potato on the plate. I had ordered something else. When I called it to the server’s attention, instead of removing my plate to the kitchen, she reached down into my plate with her bare hand, grabbed the potato and took off with it. I couldn’t believe it! Needless to say, I went home hungry!
EWWWWWWW! I can’t stop the goosebumps. Ugh.
I hope you were able to eat after that. I would have been on a fast for a few days for sure.
That is absolutely disgusting.
My worst experience was at a dim sum place outside of d.c. I had never had dim sum before, and I was enjoying it until I bit into a dumpling and felt something hard. I instantly spit it out (I thought it might be a piece of bone or something), but out came a jagged piece of glass. And, the worst part- they still made me pay for it! And all they did was give us new ones, as if I would eat another one of those….
That is absolutely disgusting.
My worst experience was at a dim sum place outside of d.c. I had never had dim sum before, and I was enjoying it until I bit into a dumpling and felt something hard. I instantly spit it out (I thought it might be a piece of bone or something), but out came a jagged piece of glass. And, the worst part- they still made me pay for it! And all they did was give us new ones, as if I would eat another one of those….
That is absolutely disgusting.
My worst experience was at a dim sum place outside of d.c. I had never had dim sum before, and I was enjoying it until I bit into a dumpling and felt something hard. I instantly spit it out (I thought it might be a piece of bone or something), but out came a jagged piece of glass. And, the worst part- they still made me pay for it! And all they did was give us new ones, as if I would eat another one of those….
Adam-I’m glad you didn’t post the name but if you hit the “Park Slope” link at the end of your article, there are two sushi places mentioned-and one of those is Taro. Geez, I’m guessing . . . .
EWWWW. Clearly the US Weekly is to blame…
Stick to Taro, it’s a winner.
Sorry you had to go through this.
I was wondering how long this cockroach would take to make it from facebook to your blog.
I wouldn’t call it “my” worst experience. But I once met an old high school friend and her fiance for breakfast in Montreal. The service was horrible, our waitress forgot to submit our orders, and when our food did arrive it wasn’t what we had asked for. I think it took more than an hour to get our meals. Of course my friend and I were so busy talking… catching up on the last 5 years of our lives… that we barely noticed. The fiance however was extremely irritated (both at the restaurant and at my friend and I for staying). Good times.
Roach crawled out from between to pancakes at a local breakfast hub. I still won’t eat there, but friends love the dress your own burger bar for lunch.
Roach crawled out from between two pancakes at a local breakfast hub. I still won’t eat there, but friends love the dress your own burger bar for lunch.
Anyone who’s ever worked in a restaurant knows that you’re always fighting a fruitless battle against the roaches and rats…the best you can do is stave them off, but they will come out at some point or the other. It’s too bad that it happened to you, but unless they are routinely serving roaches, it can happen to the best of restaurants.
This is perhaps the creepiest thing I have read about an eating experience. And isn’t this always our fear about what is happening in the back of the restaurant. I’m so glad L.A. started a health rating. I will only go to “A” restaurants now.
Oh you are really tolerance. What I will do is to go and report to the Environment Ministry and have their license suspended. It is very unhygienic especially dealing in food and they should known about infection control. Cockroach is very dirty and can bring in diseases.
As a sushi chef, just the picture alone is horrifying. My worst experience in a restaurant was also a sushi bar. I wanted to be a sushi chef but had actually never been to a sushi bar. (Long story) Th sushi chef, Asian but not Japanese, stereotyped me (a black female) before I even had a seat. I didn’t know at the time that there was such a thing as good sushi and bad sushi. What he served me made me feel very conflicted about wanting to continue on my path to sushi chefdom.
Here’s the full account:
http://stanharris.us/marisablog/2006/12/06/its-all-good-nope/
OH holy crap! That is awful! My parents had a roach crawl accross a table at a Japanese steak house once, the “chef” killed it with his spatula! They left.
We are punished for our choices. I once ate at a chinese chain and my egg roll had a big chunk of metal in it! When I questioned the waitress about how a chunk of metal gets in an egg roll and where did it even come from she informed me that they didn’t make the egg rolls, but they come from some factory in Jersey.
My ex had the same experience at the same place with their delivery, FYI.
Can you email me the name of the restaurant so I don’t bring my date there.
Thanks!
such a disturbing post… I can’t imagin how horrible that was!!!
I would have made a deal over it, and called the health dept as well because finding a partially cooked roach means they have some issues that need to be resolved for the good of the public that eats there. Roaches are fifthy bugs, they carry so many diseases YUCK, I digress.
such a disturbing post… I can’t imagin how horrible that was!!!
I would have made a deal over it, and called the health dept as well because finding a partially cooked roach means they have some issues that need to be resolved for the good of the public that eats there. Roaches are fifthy bugs, they carry so many diseases YUCK, I digress.
That might be the funniest thing I’ve heard in a long long time!! LOL out of control!
Ewww! I would probably let out a louder sound than your embarassing yelp. Everyone in that place deserves to know there was a roach in your food. That is grossss!
My worst restaurant experience: Ordering buffalo boneless wings. I like extra sauce and lots of spice but only with lots of water. I asked for a refill COUNTLESS times only to be forgotten about. Finally I asked if the waitress could bring a pitcher of water so I wouldn’t have to keep asking for refills, to which she retorted: “maybe if you didn’t ask for extra sauce, you wouldn’t need so much water!” I was PISSED. She hadn’t refilled my glass once, and I freakin’ like it with extra sauce. Ughhh.
I had a similar thing happen to me and I tried to give the restaurant the benefit of the doubt and discreetly signaled the waitress to come forward. When she saw what was in my food she asked me how she’s supposed to know I didn’t just come in with the roach in my purse!
Needless to say I got up and made a scene, which I had tried to avoid and advised the manager as I was walking out the door that I would have paid for the meal anyway but refusing to now thanks to the rude waitress.
I walked out of the restaurant with my head held high knowing that a SWAT team was on it’s way to arrest me in the dirty parking lot of the restaurant for walking out without paying.
The manager, fortunately, had the insight not to call the police.
My family and I had just been seated at a table in the front of a chinese restaurant. There was a tank filled with tilapia right next to our table.
Someone apparently ordered the fish, so someone comes along with a net and scoops two fish out.
And drops them.
So there are two fish flopping around like four feet from me, in plain view of everyone at the restaurant. The guy with the net starts BEATING the fish with the net. The hostess walks over and starts STOMPING on the fish. They eventually stop flopping, and the guy scoops them up and takes them away.
I was mortified; if they act like that in view of the customers, what do they do in the back? However, not one person in the crowded restaurant moved. Also?
My parents ordered fish.
Wow you noob that’s roach sashimi also know as atoromi in Japanese. It’s a delicacy in Okawa.
A friend of mine found a cricket in her fried rice once. On a separate occasion, she found a worm in her orange chicken…at the same well know, fast food type chinese restaurant.
Adam Roberts- AMATEUR gourmet. I’ll give Adam the benefit of the doubt that his very amateur descriptions of food and lack of knowledge (this time about Sushi)are intentional to maintain his
very amateur status. The very ambiguous non-detailed description: “the fried ball thingies (what are those thingies?” is one example. But people are interested what they are, just based on some comments. Perhaps they are Japanese croquettes-karokke.
“pieces of sushi with the fish on top of the rice (is there a name for that? When it’s not a roll?)”. It’s called Nigri, basic sushi knowledge. Then there’s “dunked it into a mixture of wasabi and soy sauce”. I’m not trying to come across as a sushi snob, but the Japanese are, in the sense that they have a right way and a wrong way to eat sushi. Mixing wasabi and soy sauce is a no-no. “adding wasabi to soy sauce is a disaster. It reduces the spiciness dramatically and masks the taste of the fish.” Many feel the same about dipping in soy sauce, definitely if you dunk (would be way too much). Also the Itamae, sushi chef, puts what he/she decides is the right amount of wasabi on the rice under the fish. Of course they give you wasabi on the side but the intent is not to mask the taste of the fish.
I enjoy Adam’s blog. I’m very impressed by his cooking and baking. Getting more “professional” all the time. I would like Adam to post a “disclaimer”, telling us if his amateurism (some documented above) is intentional or if basically he’s lazy in this area by not educating himself, easily researching the stuff he writes about.
I know there is this element of politeness we all feel when confronted by uncomfortable social situations…
But I am really shocked at the number of people who paid for dinners involving rodents and bugs. I swear that I would not go back to such a restaurant no matter what they offered me… but I cannot imagine walking out quietly and paying for a ruined meal such as this.
I wonder if this warrants a “How Do You Handle a Horrifying (or even just a really bad) Meal” post?
~ K
“The waitress didn’t speak good English”?
As a published author, I think you would know better grammar than that!
My worst experience was at a Chinese restaurant in Oakland, CA. A very reputable establishment highly recommended by friends, my partner and I anticipated a wonderful meal. After we placed our order, she excused herself and went to use the restroom. About a minute later she came rushing back to our table with a horrified look on her face. While she was entering the bathroom, one of the cooks was coming out of a stall. Without washing her hands, she picked up the meat cleaver she had left on the wash basin counter and proceeded right back into the kitchen. Needless to say, we ran out after telling the manager we were calling the Health Department.
They knew who you are! They have seen your photos & videos. They have read your comments on their restaurant.
THEY DID IT ON PURPOSE.
They wanted to get rid of you permanently and not have any more comments about their establishment.
THEY WON!
They knew who you are! They have seen your photos & videos. They have read your comments on their restaurant.
THEY DID IT ON PURPOSE.
They wanted to get rid of you permanently and not have any more comments about their establishment.
THEY WON!
I’m sorry about ur ruined restaurant experience. But please don’t blame hannah montana. it’s not her fault. :)
Hey, you see those bad boys up at the top of your banner? The meaty blue and red decapod crustaceans? Yea, they’re that cockroach’s first cousins. Why is it fine one way and not the other? I’m sure there are people all over the world who would eat that. I’m not saying I’m one of them (I don’t eat crabs and lobsters either), but I’m saying someone out there would see it as a bonus. Maybe. I really do wonder why there’s a disconnect when the bugs get bigger that makes them all of a sudden edible.
O-M-G! I would have died…that is gross…
O-M-G! I would have died…that is gross…
Oh god, now I am combing through every sushi restaurant I know in park slope hoping never to go there…I hope it isn’t geido and I hope it IS the one down the street from back to the land, where I had a grody experience myself once. eek.
I could hardly read the post after seeing the picture! It almost made me gag! My worst experience pales in comparison when I found a hair in my food.
I had a similar experience at an UWS Burritoville, only it was a Seamless Web delivery. The restaurant had the nerve to accuse me of extortion and the manager even hung up on me when I asked for a refund. Luckily Seamless Web was much more understanding and took care of the refund for me (not that they should have had to). Regardless, Burritoville deserved to be called out for having the gall to yell at me for asking for a refund after they served me a roach.
When I was a kid, I was once served a roach toasted right onto the top of a piece of garlic bread, just like he was supposed to be there. The cook didn’t see it, the waiter didn’t see it, my grandparents at the table didn’t see it… but I did. I was all, “um, what is that?” and my grandmother said, “that’s garlic bread!” like I was an idiot. Then the waiter saw it and it disappeared, replaced very quickly with the manager, offering sincere apologies and a free meal for all.
It was gross, but really? Crazy stuff happens sometimes. We did finish our meal. Still, I can’t imagine letting that plate out of the kitchen. You have to really not give a crap at all to let that happen.
I think that if you follow the links in the post to Adam’s prior posts about Park Slope sushi you can figure out the name of the offending restaurant.