Sandra Lee’s Kwanzaa Cake

This is too good not to post. Sent in by site reader Josh, here’s Sandra Lee’s Kwanzaa Cake complete with corn nuts, popcorn and “apple filling.” Special equipment? Kwanzaa candles. Oh and a cyanide caplet for after you’re done.

A belated Happy Holidays to everyone out there!

31 comments

  1. Wow. That’s just about all I can say. Somehow, I’m thinking that cyanide caplet might be better *before* the dessert course.

  2. I saw her make that abomination and I don’t remember CORN NUTS being shown on the electric teevee.

    UGH!

    (I hate angel food cake anyway – ther’es no point to it!)

  3. Actually my friends, upon closer inspection I believe this….cake, to be a most divine apparation. It should also come as no surprise that I am a fan of the infamous twinkie tiramisu (jk) ;) rock on Adam.

  4. I saw her make it on tv! She called the corn nuts “acorns”! I love watching the show because I’m just yelling at her through the whole half-hour. Sooo ridiculous.

  5. Why they continue to let this woman have a cooking show boggles my mind. I watch it for the same reason others watch Fear Factor.

  6. The the less someone knows about cooking the more time they get on FoodNetwork. Sandra Lee and Rachel Ray are abominations.

    I say we force feed them Sandra Lee’s food and make them roll around in EVOO. That’s the only reason they should ever be on TV again! While we’re at it, why not have Emeril “bam” them with gah-lic while they do it.

  7. I’m only making a wild guess that Sandra Lee doesn’t know anyone that is Black and celebrates Kwanzaa…if she does I’d love to hear their impressions of this lovely dish. In Rachel “RaySpeak” YUMMO!!! Too Cool!!!

  8. My girlfriend and I watched her make that cake on TV, prompting the gf to ask “Why the hell does the cake have to be brown? Because it’s a Kwanzaa cake? No this b*tch didn’t!”. It’s easily the most ridiculous recipe either of us has ever seen (cornuts?!?! WTF..). I don’t normally watch Sandra Lee’s show. Is she really that bad?

  9. No, Gabe, far far worse. This is actually quite tame for the woman who suggests sprinkling pixie stix in your sheets for a romantic evening at home.

  10. Yeah? Well, the Pixie Stix don’t work any better than her Kwanzaa cake ’cause she’s in a nasty divorce and her husband is going to great lengths to support Martha Stewart over Sandra.

  11. I hate Sandra Lee – when I saw her put 7Up in Sangria I almost threw up. Her “tablescapes” make me want to barf too.

    I DO like Rachael though – so I won’t say anything bad about her. Not all her ideas are great, but she’s been a big help during the week. Her Salad Cappriciossa is amazingly good.

    The BAM man may be annoying but I won a 3rd place in one of his contests so I won’t say anything there either. Yes, it was a recipe with alot of garlic in it!

    I love Food Network – altho’ when they started playing Sandra’s show I got a little sick and couldn’t believe they did that. I am not sure about several shows so I don’t watch them. I do love Alton, Sara, Bobby, Ina and Giada – they all have certificates from cooking establishments. Rachael may not but she has experience in restaurants and supermarkets. Mario is amazing too.

    I’m glad that Sandras’ hubby got smart and is divorcing her. I would be sick married to someone like that.

    He finally got smart.

    Thanks for posting this. I can’t believe she had the nerve to make a Kwaanza Cake. Unbelievable. Where did she get the corn nut idea from? They are inedible!

  12. My favorite Sandra moment:

    One day she was making something that called for chopped sweet bell peppers. She carefully removed the veins and seeds before chopping, then advised that the seeds are really hot.

    No, Sandra — chile peppers have hot seeds, NOT bell peppers! Nothing about bell peppers is hot.

  13. Gaaaaaak! She’s at it again! She’s discovered margarine and she’s making “healthy, low-fat” treats with it.

    The woman’s an insult to people who eat.

  14. she’s a booze hound.. Alcohol is her only speciality, unless she makes something with alcohol in it.. hahah. All that time and money she wastes on prefab, nasty food cuts could be better spent on a nicely catered meal from Kroger.. hee hee.

  15. I hate this woman. she’s so stupid and idiotic. she used acorns? You can’t even eat them! I bet she killed someone with that, but even more with her other food, if anyone even tries to eat it let alone make it…or watch the show. haha

  16. I think this would be hilarious — if Sandra Lee hosts an April Fool’s show, her crew should switch her booze with something non-alchoholic. I’d give anything to watch her flip out! But, then again, she’s such a lush, she’d figure it out because she probably has a finely tuned nose for the stuff & can smell it a mile away. And someone PLEASE throw the woman a damned bra! The other day, while she was stirring melted chocolate, her boobs jiggled!

  17. I hate the way she has to “POP” everything IN-to the pan. The other day she “POPPED” the dishes into the sink. I can’t stand it. I tried to watch her several times but always find myself counting the time she uses the word “pop”. Also she can turn her back to the camera every once in a while instead of running into things while she attempts to keep talking and look at the camera.

  18. Man…you guys are brutal. She is kind of annoying, but I love her cream of artichoke soup.

  19. Hahaha. How this woman stays on tv is beyond me. And beyond Anthony Bourdain. Check this out. I did a Google on Kwanzaa Cake after reading the replies to Bourdain’s blog. I thought it was a joke. I should have know better!!

    http://blog.ruhlman.com/ruhlmancom/2007/02/guest_blogging_.html

    A poster at Bourdain’s (ruhlman’s) blog actually has a Sandra Lee drinking game (appropriate, huh?) http://amandarama.blogspot.com/2004/06/sandra-lee-is-anti-christ-but-she-made.html

  20. A brown iced “Kwanzaa Cake” stuffed with apple filling, topped with corn nuts…I couldn’t believe it…so much so, that I watched it twice in order to believe what I was seeing. There are some holidays and ethnic foods that some of these “regular” stars should not consider doing. Sandra Lee isn’t the only “Food Network star” that attempts to work “outside” the box with ethnic cuisine. What are these show producers thinking?! I blame them, too. And on that note: with thousands of African-American chefs, bakers, and cooks in the USA, why can’t Food Network seem to find one to stand along side the other “foodie regulars.” I am growing rather weary of guest appearances, especially by blacks and other minorities when the “Food Network stars” prepare ethic recipes. This oversight is clearly biased, condescending and quite noticable.

  21. ok, now you take a can of corn, and don’t forget to open the can. this is very important. you need to use a can opener to get to the corn, please don’t put the can in the bowl and serve it. now, once you open the can, put it in a bowl and here’s a little trick…put salt on it. but not the whole container of salt, that would be too much.

    the food network is an absolute farce and i’ve stopped watching it. they let go of emeril and mario batali because they were real chefs. according to the food network, they want to attract more mainstream viewers. so get ready for more recipes like peanut butter/jelly sandwiches, pop-tarts, and rice krispies with coca-cola.

    anthony bourdain refered to ol’ saggy boobs as “Betty Crocker after a weekend of huffing crack”. too true.

  22. Food Network has given me some great ideas over the years. Ina, Mario…they’ve been inspirations. The newer crowd is obviously catering to a crowd that doesn’t have any time (or imagination).

    I was flipping channels this afternoon and saw Sandra Lee’s show. She was making some sort of breakfast pizza. While she was making the scrambled eggs for it, she made sure to mention that she was using organic eggs….”because we always try to feed our kids organic and healthy food”….and then she went on to use a non-organic, white flour pre-made pizza crust, pre-cooked sausage patties and pre-shredded cheese. Healthy? riiiiight. Try food that is full of preservatives and sodium…not to mention all the crazy additives to make it more appealing to the customer. She could make everything that she makes in just about the same amount of time using fresh ingredients, I have no idea why she goes to such lengths to use “pre-made” ingredients. How long does it take to whip cream? Really?

    Rachael Ray drives me absolutely insane. Her inability to say anything without punctuating it with a million matching hand motions kills me.

    She seems to have built an empire on nothing. Sounds more like savvy marketing skills than actual cooking skills to me.

  23. When I first saw the Kwanzaa Cake video, I wanted to call Al Sharpton.

    Who has this woman slept with?

  24. I don’t get to watch a lot of adult TV as a full time working mom with 2 under the age of 3 and a husband who works the opposite shift, but I have occasionally run into Sandra Lee. I found her annoying from the first view and abhorrent in her lack of skills from there on in.

    We have at times seen her show at work on our lunch hour and made comments abt the matching decor and her clothing and that it changes with each show, but we also made commentary abt her big head. I have yet to see anything abt that in these threads.

    Any who, I was not aware there was such a thing as a Kwanza cake, just like I would be surprised to learn of the existence of a Christmas cake. At any rate, I hope no one tried to copy this joke and try to eat it.

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