Fooey on Fitness: Favor Funnel Cake

Oh Lord of Fitness, please take note: yesterday I dragged myself through the hot streets of Nueva York with a gym bag on my shoulder and I walked up the steps of the David Barton gym where I have a free month’s membership, scanned my card, boarded an eliptical and burnt away my fat–my evil evil fat!–with 20 very strenuous, very focused minutes. Ok, maybe I stumbled once or twice, maybe an earbud fell out of my ear, but I burnt–I believe–around 200 calories. 200 calories! That’s like half a muffin! But I burnt it your altar, oh Lord of Fitness. I wanted to feel the rapture! Instead I felt a craving… a craving for fried dough…

Admit it, you fitness freaks, this is tempting! You may have hard bodies, but I had pure bliss tonight. My bliss beats your bliss!

Tonight’s recipe comes to us from this month’s Saveur. I’m not going to reprint it because it’s SO generic I promsie you can find a similar version online: it’s just flour, sugar, baking soda, baking powder, salt, milk and an egg. If you are desperate for it, post a desperate comment and I will post it in the comments. The cooking process is easy easy. You don’t even need a funnel to make funnel cake. I used a freezer bag, cutting the corner off at the last minute. The oil is heated to 375 degrees (make sure you have a thermometer, because this is how you start fires you firestarters you.) Once there, I dropped in the dough:


Make sure to squeeze a bit and to swirl it all around so you build a network of doughy veins. My first time I didn’t do that and it all kind of fell apart. The second time, though, it looked like this:


As you can see it gets golden brown very fast. Cook about 30 seconds on each side and then remove to a paper towel. You’ll be proud to know I only made ONE despite all the batter I had. Sprinkle with powdered sugar, resign yourself to a fat cloud and imbibe one of life’s greatest pleasures. Fitness gods be damned!

8 thoughts on “Fooey on Fitness: Favor Funnel Cake”

  1. Mind if I drool all over your blog????

    Now I have yet another thing to add to my list of cravings.. damn you for doing this to a pregnant woman. LOL

  2. Funnel cakes are heavenly beasties. Not a single worthwhile calorie in them, but damned, do they taste fine.

    I bet you can freeze the leftover dough.

  3. The last picture looks like something sentient is about to jump out of that pan and kill you.

    I’m sure it would make a good B-series movie.

    Funnel cake : THE RETURN … in 3D

    But it does look very good and I’m sure it was. I really should know better than to read this website at 4PM when I’m stuck at work and hungry.

  4. Lisa'sNotaVirgin

    Hello darling. If you up the resistance on the elliptical machine you will burn more calories (although perhaps not enough for funnel cake). The machines at my gym have 20 levels, but I usually stay somewhere around 12 or 13. Groovy.

  5. I stumbled across this on the internet, and I bet you if you top that off with vanilla icecream, it would be so good that you would cry. Just a tip. Try it. And if you cry, I wouldn’t be surprise. Thank you, good day.

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