Cookie For Kerry, Part Two

After reading many of your comments, it has come to my attention that I may get arrested for my great cookie plan. My family’s already been hassled by Republican thugs and this morning I woke up with a dead fish on my head. We’re playing with fire here.

Here’s how I’d like to do this. All Republican Kerry-voters, e-mail me your address. Maybe you will get cookies! This isn’t a bribe because of the “maybe.” Maybe, instead of cookies, you will get avocados. Then what will the authorities say? Also, I probably won’t do a follow-up on this. And those who volunteered to make cookies may hear from me too. So basically, if you prove that you’re a Republican who voted for Kerry you will most likely get cookies. But not definitely. Except probably definitely. But not in a sense that would suggest a bribe. [Oh, and if Kerry loses, no one gets SQUAT!]

Thank you. And don’t forget to vote!

13 comments

  1. Sadly, it looks like no one will get squat.

    I don’t understand Americans who are all voting for Bush, personally. Maybe he’s a “good ol’ boy”, but he’s making the US more _unsafe_, not safe, IMO.

    Sigh – it’s sad that the rest of us have to live with what you guys decide, and unfortunately, it’s someone who apparently thinks he’s doing God’s work – which apparently is bombing the hell out of everyone and destroying the environment anymore.

    Sorry, had to vent. :-)

  2. Tim I’m an American and I don’t always understand Americans either. I just can’t fathom how so many of my fellow country men and women could support Bush. I just don’t get it! Don’t these people read newspapers, watch the news, surf the web? Kerry was no prize either, but anyone is better than what we have now. I’m very afraid for us and the world!

    I live in a state that overwhelmingly voted against Bush, (particularly so in my part of the state) we support gay rights, stem cell research, do not support the warm are concerned with the well being of everyone,etc. It’s amazing to me that people in other parts of the country can be so very different. I’ts indeed a sad day for America!

  3. Try living in Georgia right now. This state overwhelmingly voted for a ban on gay marriage and all civil union rights. This is a sad day for me as a Goergian. Hopefully, this amendment will be quickly overturned by the courts (it was asking two things. . . do you support a ban on gay marriage and do you support a ban on civil union rights, but the part about civil unions was not on the ballot).

    I am seriously considering going up north for grad school and several friends and family members have expressed interest in moving with me. . . our state now has a Republican Senate, House and Govenor.

  4. As tragic as all of your stories are, I have one that can beat them all. Try living in Texas. Yes, the very state that groomed this man for the White House. It’s very tragic. I don’t know if I were to say I am more concerned than not; I have lived in a Republican-controlled state government for the last seven years and federal government for the majority of the last four.

    What’s really tragic is the state constitutional bans on gay marriage. How dense and short-sighted can people be? In eleven states, at that. So many voters I just can’t rationalize with, at the moment.

    Is there anyway *I* can get sign off of this list we call Republican-controlled America?

  5. Come on over to Illinois. We’re Blue as can be from top to bottom and we added a Congresswomen (Melissa Bean) and a man who promises to be a great U.S. Senator (Barak Obama). We’ve got some pretty darn good schools too in U of I Champaign, U of Chicago, and Northwestern.

  6. Guys, I am so sorry for you all. Here in Europe we are stoned with disbelief. I mean, he (very probably) will not only win the electoral college, but he has overall around 3,5 million votes more than Kerry! And that was not the case 4 years ago! A lot of people I talked to today are saying that before they were blaming just the government, but now it is the nation. And a lot are also talking about not visiting the States from now on. Or should we differ between the red and blue states?

    We are in grief. Blogs like this (and comments on them) are the only reason to believe there is still sanity over there.

  7. It’s great reading your comments, anyway. Over here in Europe (Turin, Italy) we are left with the impression that Americans are HOPELESS. I mean, how could this guy be reelected? He’s a total asshole, in every sense. And it’s also discouraging that it’s religious fundamentalists who brought him to power, the Western answer to Talibans and Islamists. Please, those of you who don’t identify with all this, we are ready for a second American revolution!

  8. It’s great reading your comments, anyway. Over here in Europe (Turin, Italy) we are left with the impression that Americans are HOPELESS. I mean, how could this guy be reelected? He’s a total asshole, in every sense. And it’s also discouraging that it’s religious fundamentalists who brought him to power, the Western answer to Talibans and Islamists. Please, those of you who don’t identify with all this, we are ready for a second American revolution!

  9. I really appreciate the commentary here from both North Americans who, like myself, are in a kind of mourning today, and our fellow world citizens in other places. What distress. I was literally sick all night, chills and headache this a.m., and couldn’t go to work. Somehow, although it looks like food poisoning, I don’t think it was “something I ate”.

    I must ask you, thought, to please try not to lump all U.S. citizens together as “hopeless”. Imagine the hopelessness that so many of us feel today. Imagine our efforts, making phone calls, going door to door, trying to persuade people with simple logic that they couldn’t possibly want a leader who had given the biggest tax break in history to the top 1% in the country — a leader who’s creating unsafe conditions for all of us — a leader who’s utterly derelict in taking responsible leadership to insure that government takes care of the other 99% with health care and education, but who wants to legislate women’s control of their reproductive rights, and people’s right to love and marry whom they choose.

    Please, before you simply condemn Americans outright, try to remember that although the election was not as close as we might have wanted (I still suspect massive fraud, to be honest), large numbers of us didn’t want this outcome either. Those of us who didn’t want this outcome live in all 50 states, red and blue.

  10. Sorry Julie, you are perfectly right. Besides, I have an American citizenship myself even though my parents are Italian and I have lived over here all my life. In a way although I vote I don’t really feel responsible for what happens in the US. But that doesn’t mean all of you who have to put up with it every day are. Still, lots of people question the right of someone to decide over the wellbeing of the worldwide population while having been brought to power by Americans alone. You see, we don’t believe in the US’s mission in the world or in its moral supremacy. The man who was elected thinks GOD himself is guiding him in his war against evil. He scares me just as much as Islamic fundamentalist do, with which he shares the language. Anyway, good luck to us all, it’s going to be a tough four years, love

  11. Savina, I completely appreciate and agree with your point. The world’s “superpowers”, especially the US, have far too much power over the lives of people in the rest of the world, not to speak of its own citizens. I’m reminded of Ronald Reagan referring to Central America as “our back yard” — the most horrible kind of blatant-yet-covert imperialism. Honestly…I doubt that even Bush believes that GOD is guiding him. I think that’s just rhetoric to persuade the sadly benighted fundamentalist masses in this country.

    My worry is that it’s not just how dreadful the next four years will be. The reverberations of the insane economic policies which have already begun (deficit spending, making the huge tax breaks permanent, for example), the possibility of Supreme Court appointments… my fear is that it may take us 20 years to undo the damage that is about to be brought upon us. And on that happy note…cookies, anyone?

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