In New York, Papaya Means Hot Dog

Seriously.

If you see “papaya” in the name of a store, that means they sell hot dogs there. This may be obvious to locals, but to foreigners it can be extremely confusing.

“Finally, Boris, a store that sells papya! Little Popette can get the nutrients she needs to live!”

Sorry, Popette. If the lack of real papaya doesn’t kill you, the hot dog will. But not for lack of flavor!

But first some context. Tonight, Lisa had tickets to a Daily Show taping. I arrived at 4:30, way earlier than required—the doors don’t open until 5:45. Lisa would arrive straight from work at 5:35. Indeed, I was quite early. But, wouldntyaknowit, there was already an enormous line twisting around the building. By the time 5:35 rolled around, a man in a black t-shirt came out and told me and everyone behind me that we weren’t getting in, even if we had tickets. We could go see Colin Quinn instead. So Lisa and I bailed.

Walking home was like walking through a picture in a history book from the year 2050. Here was New York during one of the most contentious presidential elections ever–streets lined with protesters (we walked through Herald Square, which felt eerily like the Times Square scene in Spiderman before the Green Hornet appears) and I’ve never seen so many people crowded into one space. A woman yelled into a department store: “While you’re shopping bombs are dropping!” And then a stream of black cars drove by with police escorts and the entire crowd started chanting: “Shame, shame.” Lisa commented that it “smelled like ass.”

Which is why when we finally reached my apartment, Lisa wanted to go home. She’s very smell sensitive. For example, while she enjoyed the actual risotto last night she complained about the lingering smell that plagued her fingers throughout the day. “I still can’t get the smell off my hands,” she said. She could sniff a baseball through a straw.

I, in turn, wanted to eat. I set my heart on hot dogs (though the thought of frying risotto did sound appealing) and made my way down 23rd toward Chelsea Papaya. There I ordered the #1: two hot dogs and a 16 oz drink. I chose, quite appropriately, the papaya drink. Have you ever tasted McDonald’s orange drink? It tasted like that, only better. And more like papaya than orange.

On the hot dogs I requested sauerkraut and mustard. I’ve always been a mustard boy, but sauerkraut was a new frontier. Would you believe this was the first time I had sauerkraut on a hot dog? I felt it was something I had to do. And I’m glad I did: it tasted good.

You know, I’d like to mention here my beef (pun intended) with those who think hot dogs are disgusting. “It’s all the leftover bits they don’t use from the pig shoved into a sack.” My answer? So what. Is it really that different from eating any other part of the pig? Flesh is flesh, yo. So a pork chop comes from the middle, that makes it better than–say–a snout? (Ewww, they put snout in hot dogs? Gross!) But you see what I mean? There may be other arguments there–like hot dog meat is processed meat, and so on–but unless that’s your reason, don’t give me shit about the shit in my hot dog. Look for the Papaya sign and bite the hot-dogial bullet.

8 comments

  1. Amateur Gourmet, I have to let you in on the Best Hot Dogs Ever, practically in your back yard! On 23rd between 7th & 8th, there’s a little place called F&B. It’s like H&M, only it’s food. http://fandb.geomerx.com/

    Be sure to get the fries, and also the lemonade. Yummy.

  2. Let’s hear it for the hot dog! It is one of life’s simple pleasures. I grew up in a town just a little bit north of NYC and there’s a little hot dog place there called Pete’s Hot Dogs. Every visit back requires a stop at Pete’s for a couple (okay maybe 4) dogs w/ mustard and kraut and a couple of chocolate milks to wash them down! We called them “snappers” because the natural casing of the dog had just enough resistance when you bit into it. Just haven’t found anything to match that here in Atlanta.

  3. On a related hot dog riff, last night I went with friends to the newst, hottest see-and-be-scene bar in Philly. Got up to the roof terrace where the elite were chi-chi-ing over lavish cocktails only to discover– the rooftop terrace has a giant BBQ where they’re doig filets, corn, and hot dogs. HOT DOGS?!? WHo eatshot dogs with cocktails? And how is that bar trendy? It did not effect my enjoyment of a delicious appletini, I am pleased to report.

  4. Okay, I’m gonna be a complete comic book/movie nerd here, but Spider Man foung the Green Goblin, not the Green Hornet. (Although that would be a cool team-up, as long as Kato is there also)

    Okay, back to my mom and dad’s basement to see LOTR for the 504th time……

  5. 이 사이트의 무궁한 발전을 기원드립니다.

    기네스북에 도전할 정도로 빠르고

    100배 쉽게 영어를 정복할수 있는 원리를 아십니까

    이 원리를 보고 많은 지식인들은 영어의 혁명이

    일어났다고 한답니다.

    사이트 http://www.007.or.kr 에서 그 모든것을 확인해

    볼수 있아오니 모든 분들이 영어를 100배 쉽게 빠르게 학습

    했으면 하는 마음 간절하여 이글 드립니다.

    운영자님 대단히 죄송합니다.

    이 내용게시를 원하지 않으시면 아래 메일로 사이트주소를 통보해 주시면

    다시는 올려지는 일이 없도록 하겠습니다.

    (사이트에 연결되는 다른 주소가 있다면 모든 사이트 주소도 알려

    주셔야 다시는 올라가지 않습니다)

    — 메일주소 apadong1@hotmail.com 입니다.

    비번: 1234

%d bloggers like this: