October 26, 2006 2:16 AM | By Adam Roberts | 51 Comments

Female On A Plate Contest Entries: Vote For Your Favorite NOW!

We had three impressive responses to my Female On A Plate contest, a contest inspired by a quote from Usher in New York magazine. Responding to the question, "What kind of dish would you like to inspire?" Usher answered: "Female on a Plate. It would be any kind of dessert I eat--chocolate cake, banana pudding. They have Sex on The Beach. Why Can't I have Female on a Plate?" And thus a contest was born.

And so here they are, three entries for Female on a Plate. Interestingly, they are all done by females. Please vote for your favorite in the comments. Please only vote once. The winner receives an USHER CD or poster. Lucky them! Now let's get to it...

(1) Kim M. of Convivial offers up her Female on A Plate--a fig tartlet with warm vanilla bean sabayon:


Kim writes on her site, "Consuming a woman should be quite an experience, I would think. At the very least your head should swoon from heady, erotic flavors. Ingesting a woman ought to fill you with the soft, soothing comfort of a feminine touch. But above all, it would be warm, sensuous and complex." The rest of her explanation is on her site--it's very thoughtful and worth reading.

(2) Taking a different approach is Brilynn F. of the blog Jumbo Empanadas. Here's her zesty entry:


Brilynn writes: "Here's my entry for your Usher contest, I thought the whole thing was pretty hilarious. Unfortunately, the dish that I actually tried to make didn't turn out AT ALL, but I hope this works for a substitute." Does it? You be the judge!

And now for the final entry...

(3) Sophie R. of Foodie and the Feast offers up not one but two delectable dishes that fit under the umbrella of "Female on A Plate."

She writes, "Is Usher objectifying women? Yes, definitely, without a doubt. But, Usher is an idiot. We all know from his break-up with Chilli, Usher was a sex addict and he cheated on her (go listen to Confessions). I don't think he meant he wanted a female slathered in bread pudding served on a plate. You can see that with his analogy of Sex on the Beach. The cocktail is just supposed to remind you of some good times that possibly happened on a beach.. not literally recreate some kind of scene in your glass. He just wanted something good on his plate. So good, that it reminds him of all those times he did all those females. Yeah, the whole female on a plate lingo is totally wrong... but the essence of it.. creating something that tastes so good that its orgasmic - it's an interesting challenge!"

Her first dish is: "Sumac Skirt Steak with Pomegranate reduction."


Sophie writes: "So I don't know if anything I make is THAT good (modesty is a good thing). Why not make a meal that is pretty good and get a boost from one of the ingredients by choosing an ingredient that is a known aphrodisiac? First thing that came to mind was the pomegranate. Autumn is the start of pomegranate season and its seeds look like jewels."

As her second dish, Sophie offers "Roasted Bosc Pear with Pomegranate Glaze."


You can read the full account of her dishes here.


Ok, so now it's time to USHER in a winner. Choose your favorite and vote in the comments and do so by tomorrow night at midnight EST. Good luck contestants! And thanks for entering.


i vote for kim! her dish looks delicious, her description is excellent, and it really seems to capture the essence of what i would want a woman on a plate to be. :)

Brilynn F. - Go Barbie!!!!

I vote for Brilynn F. since she made me laugh.

Am I allowed to vote for me even if the first entry is FAR superior? :)

Although Kim's pomegranate reduction sounds delicious, my vote goes to Brilynn because I have a feeling that Brilynn's entry is closer to what Usher meant. (Pig!)

Kim, no contest. Although I think a phyllo crust would have been a better choice (delicate, multilayered, etc) I think the figs are a genius choice.

Go Kim!!!!!

my vote is for kim m.it makes me excited just looking at it. makes me want to dive right in...

Brilynn F. for sure....

Kim for sure! I want to eat that right now! :)

Kim, definately! The figs, so sensual.

I'm torn between #2 and #3 so I guess I'll go with #3 since it is actually food. #2 is hilarious, though. (I'm not a fan of the fig. Sorry!)

I'm waffling between the first and the third, but I think that Kim really captured the essence of the idea.

I vote for Kim M - the clear winner in my opinion although number 2 is very funny.

My vote is for Kim

All of these far surpass anything I could have come up with

I vote for Brilynn, the photo styling alone should win it for her, Barbie in a studio with a whip cream bikini?! Brilliant. I think Usher would agree.

I vote for Kim

Brilynn F. all the way! It may not be 100% edible, but come on: nothing says 'Female on a Plate' like a female on a plate.

I vote for Kim. She captured it exactly, I think. I'm impressed. (Although the Barbie is hysterical.)

Kim. Dang, that looks delicious!

I vote for the visually sensual pears. But nothing speaks to man like steak with pomegranates.

I vote for Kim

I vote Kim!

Kim, definitely.. I love her explanation of her choices.. although like most everyone else, #2 did make me just cackle out loud :}

The food and sentiment in both the first and third entries are fantastic, but I'm gonna have to go with the Barbie because it's not taking Usher so seriously. Make those beautiful edibles for someone you love, not Usher! Unless you love Usher.

Kim M - poetic, romantic and edible.

My vote goes to Brilynn for capturing the rununculousness of Usher's comment; however, I'd like to state for the record that I would pay top dollar to eat anything made by Kim (not limited to that incredible-looking fig sculpture).

Kim's fig tartlet!

definitely kim - esp. with the figs perhaps an intended reference to the original woman (eve) and the fig leaves...?

kim, mmm.

Kim, definitely...ooh, I so want to bite into that tart. The second entry does win brownie points for being hilarious though!

I vote for kim.

Bosc Pear - subtle

Kim! That tartlet looks divine and reminds me that I haven't had figs in an awfully long time ... Sophia's entries look great, too, but you know ... FIGS!

OH ! Kim for sure,--Love figs and thepresentaton is fantastic. T

Did no one make a boobies cake?

One more for Kim!

Kim! partly because my cousin once used a fig as a womb in a science presentation. and besides, it's such a beautiful done tartlet. if i had to be one of the Females, that'd definitely be the one i'd want to be.

Kim's is stunning, I think hers is the best. But, like everyone else I love Brilynn's humor. But figs..mmm...



Brilynn's for sure!

Kim takes it all..her description sent me chasing after my wife!

Although it appears she doesn't need my vote, my vote is for Kim M.


Wow!! Three entries and one is a Barbie!

Kim = Yum.

Like the combination of flesh (steak)and pomegranate to represent woman. We're not all whipped cream and goodness.

Brilynn- Clear and to the point.

You have a very interesting site. Kindly see our cookbook on www.pritya.com. We would appreciate your comments on it.

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Congratulations Kim!

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