If I Eat This Scone

Why oh why did I buy this scone while sitting here at Proof Bakery in Atwater Village where the pastries are tempting and the cakes are alluring and I came for a sandwich but now I want coffee and while ordering coffee I heard my mouth say, “I’ll have a scone too” and the woman said, “It’s cherry” and I said, “Ooooh” and she said, “I’ll give you an extra big one” and I was like, in my head, “Nooo, don’t, because I’m supposed to go to the gym later!” and I know if I eat this scone I probably won’t go to the gym later which is faulty logic seeing as eating the scone should make me want to go to the gym more because there’s more to burn but, in fact, it makes me want to go to the gym less because I’ve already blown it, health-wise, so what’s the point as I stare at this scone in front of me and question whether I should eat it at all or just take it home to reward myself with later.

Continue Reading

How Do You Not Weigh 500 Pounds?


If there’s one question I get asked all the time, whether in my blog comments or over Twitter, it’s: “How do you not weigh 500 pounds?”

It’s usually in response to a post about a very decadent meal or a recipe that involves several sticks of butter (like Craig’s birthday cake). The question implies that food with lots of butter or meals with lots of heavy courses are somehow responsible for massive weight gain; it ignores one’s own agency in the matter, assuming that when one bakes a cake with five sticks of butter that one is therefore going to consume several sticks of butter. If you visualize those five sticks of butter spread throughout a giant two layer cake, however, and then you cut an individual slice out of it, you come to realize that one piece of that cake represents just a few tablespoons of butter. And therein lies the answer.

Continue Reading