Much hilarity ensued tonight when I tried to explain to Diana how eating eggs is like eating sperm. Think about it: eggs and sperm are the basic components of reproduction. But when we order eggs for breakfast or crack them into a cake we don’t think of them that way. But it’s the female equivalent of sperm: and if somebody ordered scrambled sperm for breakfast, you’d call them crazy.

It’s insight like this that justifies my up-and-coming status in the world of food writing.

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