My brother stayed with me a few weeks ago and was shocked to learn that I didn’t own a coffee maker. “I am shocked to the core!” he said or didn’t say depending on whether or not you think I’m Frasier and my brother is Niles Crane.
I remedied this a few days ago when I purchased a Cuisinard coffee maker from Bed, Bath and Beyond. Of all the Cuisinards, this was the least expensive—it doesn’t grind the beans—but it’s nice enough to deter me from my habit of spending millions of dollars at coffee shops just for the privilege at staring at other people drinking coffee and reading newspapers and wondering why they don’t buy their own damn coffee makers.
After purchasing my coffee maker, I made a beeline straight for Dunkin’ Donuts which sells the world’s best coffee. I purchased a bag of French Vanilla, made my way home, unpacked the coffee maker, followed the instructions, plugged it in, cleaned the coffee pot, cleaned the filter basket, placed a filter in and went to open my bag of coffee. Only I noticed that I’d purchased Whole Beans, not already ground, and I made my way down the elevator, back to 7th avenue, where I returned this bag of the world’s best coffe: bean version for the world’s best coffee: grinded up like we like it. (Perhaps I will one day buy a coffee grinder!)
Along with my coffee, though, I’d need some pastry—and what better a pastry to make for a new coffee maker then a coffee cake? Do I really need to tell you where I got the recipe? I know you know. You know you know. Must we really? All together now: BAREFOOT CONTESSA. (Yes, yes, I’m so predictable—but you still like me, don’t you?)
So here they are, the happy coffee couple: coffee maker and coffee cake.
Don’t you just love a new appliance? I know Samantha does on “Sex and the City” and so do I. Welcome home, coffee maker… you’re part of the family, now. Don’t let us down or we’ll throw you in the river with your sister, Sissy the underaccomplished teapot. WE TOLD YOU, SISSY, BE SHORTER! BE STOUTER! YOU DIDN’T LISTEN!